Buddhism and Navigating Relationships as an Adoptee in Society

The Eightfold Path

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The Eightfold Path, this concept is related to Buddhism and refers to a set of principles and practices that are believed to lead to spiritual awakening and the end of suffering. Fulfilling the Eightfold Path can be a deeply personal and individual journey, and will likely look different for every person. However, some practices that may be helpful for adoptees seeking to fulfil the Eightfold Path include mindfulness meditation, ethical conduct, and developing wisdom and understanding. It may also be helpful to seek guidance from a teacher or mentor who has experience in the Buddhist tradition.

How do I do that?

To fulfil the Eightfold Path in Buddhism, you can follow these general steps:

1. Right Understanding: Develop a clear understanding of the Four Noble Truths, which are the foundation of Buddhist teachings. These truths state that life is suffering, suffering arises from craving and attachment, it is possible to end suffering, and the path to the end of suffering is the Eightfold Path.
2. Right Intent: Cultivate a strong intention to follow the Eightfold Path and end suffering for yourself and others. This includes a commitment to acting ethically and avoiding harmful behaviour.
3. Right Speech: Practice speaking truthfully, kindly, and with helpful words, and avoid lying, gossiping, or speaking in a harmful manner.
4. Right Action: Engage in actions that are helpful and avoid actions that are harmful. This includes following the Five Precepts, which are guidelines for ethical conduct in Buddhism.
5. Right Livelihood: Choose a career or way of life that does not cause harm to yourself or others.
6. Right Effort: Make a consistent effort to improve yourself and follow the Eightfold Path, and avoid engaging in negative or unhelpful behaviour.
7. Right Mindfulness: Develop mindfulness and awareness of your thoughts, feelings, and actions, and use this awareness to cultivate a clearer understanding of the nature of reality.
8. Right Concentration: Practice concentration and meditation to calm the mind and deepen your understanding of the Eightfold Path.

It’s important to remember that fulfilling the Eightfold Path is a long-term process, and may take many years of consistent effort and practice.

would it be ethical for someone to forcibly separate a child from their mother from an esoterical and Buddhist perspective?

From an esoteric and Buddhist perspective, forcibly separating a child from their mother would not be considered ethical. In Buddhism, the principle of non-harm is central, and this extends to all beings, including children. Forcibly separating a child from their mother would likely cause harm and suffering to both the child and the mother, and would therefore go against the Buddhist principle of non-harm.

In Buddhism, it’s also important to cultivate compassion and understanding for others and to avoid actions that cause harm or suffering. Forcibly separating a child from their mother would go against this principle, as it would cause both the child and the mother to suffer.

Additionally, Buddhism emphasizes the importance of relationships and interconnectedness and recognizes that all beings are connected and interdependent. Forcibly separating a child from their mother would disrupt this connection and cause harm to both the child and the mother, which goes against the Buddhist principle of interconnectedness.

In summary, from an esoteric and Buddhist perspective, forcibly separating a child from their mother would not be considered ethical and would go against the principles of non-harm, compassion, and interconnectedness.

So how does an adoptee find stabilisation after a great loss?

Finding stability after experiencing great loss, such as being separated from one’s biological family through adoption, can be a challenging and difficult process for an adoptee. However, there are some strategies that can be helpful in navigating this loss and finding stability:

1. Connect with others who understand: Joining a support group for adoptees or connecting with other people who have had similar experiences can provide a sense of community and help you feel less isolated.
2. Seek therapy: Talking with a trained therapist can be a helpful way to process your emotions and work through the challenges associated with adoption and separation from one’s biological family.
3. Connect with your cultural heritage: Learning about your cultural heritage and connecting with others from the same cultural background can provide a sense of identity and belonging.
4. Cultivate self-care: Taking care of your physical, emotional, and mental well-being is important in navigating loss and finding stability. This might include engaging in activities that bring you joy, practising mindfulness and meditation, or seeking professional help if needed.
5. Create a new family narrative: Adoptees can create a new sense of family and belonging by forming relationships with adoptive family members, building a new support network, or connecting with birth family members if possible.
6. Explore your feelings: Adoptees may benefit from exploring their feelings through journaling, art, or other forms of self-expression.
7. Embrace a holistic approach: Adoptees may benefit from a holistic approach that addresses the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual aspects of their experiences. This might include engaging in spiritual practices or seeking alternative forms of healing.

These strategies can help adoptees navigate their loss and find stability, but it’s important to remember that every person’s experience is unique, and what works for one person may not work for another. Additionally, it’s important to seek support and seek professional help if needed.

If life is a transmission of feeling how can other people know what is it like to feel like an adoptee?

Life is indeed a transmission of feelings, and while others may never truly know what it’s like to feel like an adoptee, they can still gain insight into and empathy for the experiences of adoptees. Here are some ways that this can be achieved:

1. Communication: Adoptees sharing their experiences and feelings can help others understand what it’s like to feel like an adoptee. This can include sharing stories, writing, or engaging in other forms of self-expression.
2. Education: Learning about adoption and the experiences of adoptees can help others gain a better understanding of what it’s like to feel like an adoptee. This can be done through books, articles, documentaries, or other educational materials.
3. Empathy: By putting oneself in another person’s shoes and trying to understand their experiences, it is possible to develop empathy for the experiences of adoptees. This can involve listening to adoptees’ stories, asking questions, and trying to understand the challenges and emotions that adoptees may face.
4. Relationships: Building relationships with adoptees or being in close proximity to adoptees can provide opportunities to learn about their experiences and develop empathy for their feelings.
5. Exposure to Adoptee Voices: Engaging with and learning from the perspectives and experiences of adoptees through #AdopteeVoices can help others gain insight into what it’s like to feel like an adoptee.

The wider community

The wider community plays an important role in supporting adoptees and creating a supportive and understanding environment for them. Here are some ways the wider community can interact with and support adoptees:

1. Listen and support: By actively listening to adoptees’ experiences and providing support, the wider community can help adoptees feel heard and validated.
2. Advocate for adoptee rights: The wider community can advocate for policies and practices that support adoptees, such as open adoption records and access to information about biological family history.
3. Celebrate diversity: By embracing and celebrating diversity, the wider community can create a supportive environment for adoptees and help them feel valued and accepted.
4. Encourage self-expression: By providing opportunities for adoptees to express themselves and share their experiences, the wider community can help adoptees process their feelings and feel heard.
5. Promote understanding: By promoting understanding and awareness of adoption, the wider community can help reduce stigma and create a more supportive environment for adoptees.
6. Get involved with #AdopteeVoices: By engaging with #AdopteeVoices and other organizations focused on adoption and adoptee issues, the wider community can help support adoptees and create a more supportive environment for them.

The wider community has a significant impact on the lives of adoptees, and by working together, we can create a more understanding and supportive environment for adoptees and help them navigate the challenges associated with adoption and separation from their biological family.